Friday, July 30, 2010

Quoteblog #8

“You have a small cancer on your skin” – Doctor
“Eh?! I don’t smoke, not since I was a girl!” – Elderly patient

“I think most doctors could be good patients if they just keep their mouths shut” – Clinical educator

Me, sneezing, “I beg your pardon”
Elderly patient, “Don’t beg – you’re old enough to steal”

“There was a big move 10 or so years ago to keep the cervix – it was fashionable” – Gynaecologist, on things only gynaecologists would know

“I don’t do prostates – I’m a gynaecologist” – Gynaecologist

“I used to think ‘oh big deal, the miracle of life’ ... but actually, it’s pretty badass” – male student

“I am a pink lady” – male student, reading a sticker attached to his foot

“Just lick it a little bit” – girl to male medical student (talking about lip balm, I believe)

“I wouldn’t mind a zombie apocalypse” – male student

“I’m ready to be blown!” – female student

“Yeah, it’s pretty easy to piss off a midwife. You point your vagina the wrong way, and you’ll get a good talking-to” – Psychiatry consultant

“Are you really sure you wanted to kill yourself or did you just want a sandwich?” – Psychiatry consultant

“REAL maple syrup?! Did Centrelink come in today?” – friend looking at my groceries

"They performed an autopsy on my leg" - elderly patient after a skin biopsy

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