Friday, September 21, 2012

Medical Intern: A Day In The Life

Not a typical day so far, but an accurate recount of today:

0745: arrive first, print out patient lists and start writing some discharge scripts
0750: make self coffee and sit down to check patient list
0755: put hand in coffee mug and spill coffee all over paperwork
0800: sit down for multidisciplinary meeting and rip side of dress so the pocket is now just a gap
0800 - 0845: muddle through meeting and present the few patients that you can remember from yesterday's ward round, because you've had a few days off and forgotten everybody else.
0845: learn that your consultant has clinic all day and you'll be running ward round. It's ok, you have a final-year student to help you
0845-1600: ward round, interspersed with nurses harassing you to discharge random patients because of bed pressure, and patients discharging themselves of their own accord
1600: dismiss student because you feel bad making them stay late on a Friday
1600-1700: frantic last-minute paperwork that needs to be finished in business hours
See ex with blonde medical student
Call it a day and leave hospital.
1706-1707: drive home (because you're a rural intern)
1708-1715: search for running shoes
1716-1720: go for a run, get puffed, go home
1721-1750: set up Wii Boxing and work out frustration in a more sheltered setting
1751: call from nurse asking you to urgently come back to work and do a discharge summary for a patient who is transferring to a city hospital RIGHT NOW. And you haven't done it yet because you spent the whole day pretending to be a consultant
1752: back at work doing the discharge summary (ok you showered first). Fax to city hospital
1755: learn that the patient dropped his BP at the airport and Flying Docs aren't happy to put him on the plane. He's coming back to the hospital.
(Cry a little on the inside)
1800: pizza with the nurses
1830: patient back on ward. Spend next few hours trying to fix everything - on phone with consultant and Flying Docs, and in discussion with ED staff who will cover the ward overnight. Learn that patient's blood pressure is back to normal and he is walking around all by himself. Learn that patient will not be retrieved tonight and will probably lose his bed in city hospital.
(Cry a little on the inside)
2100: Night nurse comes in and asks, "what, did you sh*t your bed and can't go home?"
2101: Go home

This is why we get paid the big bucks random amounts of pay and never see our payslips.


Pink Stethoscopes said...


2200: Call from Flying Docs on your mobile. They want to tell you ... something ... and re-affirm that patient is not flying anywhere tonight. Cool.

PTR said...

You did punch that night nurse in the face, right? Right?

Pink Stethoscopes said...

PTR I think you'll understand this - I'm now so ground-down that I'm beyond punching people in the face. Is that normal or should we still have that capability?

PTR said...

Sadly I know exactly where you're coming from.